April 2021 — What do you do with unclear and overwhelming feelings?
You will realize that my April reflection post was delayed.
I almost decided to not post anything at all and just maybe skip and post for May 2021. However, I know what this means to me — to show up even when it is not in line with what I had initially planned. I will show up anyway — in the way I have the capacity for. That is all that matters for now.
April was a hard one and that evidently reflected on how I had to process the month. There was a lot that I had to make sense out of and it just went over my head. It was emotionally draining and work-wise a bit overwhelming.
I am grateful that I can hold space for the unpleasant feelings and be human.
April also marked 6 months in my role and I must say for me at this moment, I am not sure I have the words to describe the feeling and I won't rush to name the feelings apart.
April offered me time to breathe even when I felt heavy. I am grateful for the offerings of my surroundings. After I had my time to breathe, I showed up to send this post.
That is all the lesson I need for myself to thrive and push through.